Delhi Metro Diaries: A Reflection on Parenting, Language, and Changing Cultural Values in India
Rajkumari Sharma Tankha
A routine journey on the Delhi Metro recently turned into a moment of deep reflection on modern parenting in India, language preferences, and shifting cultural values.
As someone who usually travels in the women’s coach, I often observe small, everyday interactions that reveal larger societal truths. This time, it was an encounter with two women—and a young child—that left a lasting impression.
A Common Scene, An Uncommon Realisation
One woman, let’s call her A, was travelling with her seven-year-old son. The other, B, was a solo commuter. What began as an ordinary metro ride soon unfolded into a telling snapshot of urban Indian behaviour and parenting styles.
A occupied more than her fair share of space, juggling large bags and a restless child who frequently bumped into a fellow passenger. Despite the inconvenience caused, there was little awareness or consideration for others—something increasingly visible in crowded public spaces today.
Meanwhile, A remained engrossed in a long phone conversation, seemingly oblivious to her surroundings. It was only after finishing her call that she turned her attention to her son.
The Language Divide: Hindi vs English in Indian Households
What stood out most was A’s remark:
“Talking in Hindi is not allowed. My son doesn’t understand Hindi.”
This statement reflects a growing trend in urban India, where English is often prioritised over native languages. While English proficiency is valuable, sidelining one’s mother tongue raises important concerns about cultural disconnect.
Language is more than just a medium of communication—it is deeply tied to identity, heritage, and emotional expression. When children are discouraged from speaking their native language, they risk losing a vital connection to their roots.
An Unexpected Intervention
At this point, B stepped into the conversation, attempting to engage the child. However, the boy remained silent, responding only with “Mum,” possibly confused or uncomfortable.
B’s persistence soon turned into unsolicited advice. When she learned the child had skipped school for a family visit, she remarked:
“Maasi is not important. You should have gone to school.”
She went further, suggesting that participating in a singing audition could have led to fame—and even “many girlfriends.”
What Are We Teaching the Next Generation?
These seemingly casual remarks reveal deeper issues in child upbringing and value systems in India:
1. Disconnect from Language and Culture
Discouraging children from speaking Hindi (or any native language) may lead to a gradual erosion of cultural identity.
2. Devaluation of Relationships
Calling a close family bond “unimportant” signals a shift toward prioritising achievement over relationships.
3. Materialistic and Superficial Aspirations
Equating success with fame, popularity, or social validation reflects changing definitions of achievement among young minds.
The Child Caught in Between
The child’s silence perhaps said the most. Torn between conflicting expectations—being discouraged from speaking Hindi while not fully comfortable in English—he appeared withdrawn and uncertain.
It raises an important question:
Are we, in our pursuit of modernity, creating confusion rather than confidence in our children?
A Larger Reflection on Globalisation in India
This incident also highlights the broader impact of globalisation on Indian society. While exposure to global cultures brings growth and opportunity, it also risks diluting local values if not balanced thoughtfully.
I was reminded of a moment years ago when an NRI relative proudly mentioned her young son had “many girlfriends” at school. What once felt like a distant cultural difference now seems much closer to home.
Finding the Balance
Progress does not have to come at the cost of identity. Teaching children English should not mean discouraging Hindi or any other native language. Encouraging ambition should not mean undermining relationships.
The real challenge for modern Indian parenting lies in striking a balance—between global exposure and cultural grounding, between ambition and empathy.
Conclusion
A simple metro ride turned into a mirror reflecting the changing social fabric of urban India. It reminded me that the values we casually express today shape the adults our children will become tomorrow.
Perhaps it’s time to pause and ask ourselves:
What are we really teaching the next generation?
