Rajkumari Sharma Tankha
Is there anyone in your life who drives you crazy with anger and frustration? Someone who is very close, may be family, but with whom you cannot see eye to eye? He/ she drives you mad and no matter what you do, this person would never come on the same page with you.
Well, most psychologists will tell you to steer clear from such a person for your own sanity. They will tell you to cut off ties, and go separate ways rather than stick together and lose peace. But that’s not what a person who delves into spiritualism will tell you. For, they know there is much more than meets the eye.
Let us understand why this happens. Why are there certain people, especially in the close circle – family, friends or work life – who drive you nuts. Well, this is so because it is not a matter of this lifetime alone. You have been associated with each other for one or more lives in the past and developed huge karmic debt, which you got to clear. For, till you do so, you will keep coming together in each life, getting on to each other’s nerves with increased intensity every next time. That annoying relative of yours could have been a co-worker with whom you didn’t get along in the past life; your present office colleague who is most mean to you may be born as a sibling in the next life…
Significantly, coming together has been your souls’ choice. You both decided to work things out before you were born – the guides and angels helped you arrive at this decision in the larger good of your soul, for your soul’s growth and ascension. You returned together in this lifetime to ensure that you’d work things out, and clear both of your energies – something you forgot after you spent some time on the earth.
But the soul remembers everything, and it reminds you as well every now and then to make peace with the person. When you don’t pay attention to it, it gets silenced. You, then, don’t get those instinctual messages. Mind rules over, and either you end up having bitter fights or turn into complete strangers. You forget that you came together to work things out, to forgive the other and move on, or shall I say move up.
Forgiving someone who has harmed you, overtly or covertly, is no easy task, but a MUST it is. And, it is important for your own self. Forgiving doesn’t mean you forgive the wrong deed done, it simply means you accept the person as he/she is and make peace with it. It means not getting angry over what they did to you, it means taking equal responsibility for the altercation that happened between the two of you, and forgiving yourself and the other. Once you develop a practice of doing this, you will realise that the behaviour of the other person will cease to have any impact on you. You will gain more control over yourself and be in your own peaceful space. A day will come when you will look back at the situation and the relationship without any tinge of pain or regret. You will be impervious to that person’s behaviour. That is the day the karmic debt is cleared. And the karmic cycle is broken.
Karmic relationships are akin to having a tug-of-war. They’re power plays, in each person pull the rope back to self. While in the game, there is one clear cut winner, in karmic tug of war no one wins. Rather, both keep getting entangled in the mesh further and further deep. BUT when one person drops his or her side of the rope, the power struggle stops.
