Common myths that prevent couples from seeking fertility help
Dr. Snehal Kohale
Infertility is not just a medical condition; it’s an emotional journey, one that often begins much later than it should. Many couples delay seeking help not because of a lack of awareness, but myths, stigma, and societal pressure that surrounds the topic. The conversations about infertility are often whispered, hidden, or completely avoided. But what remains unspoken continues to hurt, not only physically but emotionally.
I often meet couples who come to me after years of trying, years filled with frustration, confusion, and misinformation. What’s most heartbreaking is that many could have conceived earlier had they not fallen prey had they sought help earlier. But what prevents them is “what people will say.” It’s time to talk about the unspoken barriers that keep couples from seeking timely, practical help.
Let’s talk of myths
One of the most common myths I encounter is the belief that infertility is only a woman’s problem. Even today, in many homes, when a couple struggles to conceive, the focus shifts to the woman. She is the one who undergoes tests, treatments, and often, blame, while the male partner is left out of the diagnostic equation entirely. In reality, research clearly shows that infertility is equally shared. About 40 per cent of cases are due to male factors, and 40per cent female, the rest unexplained or combined. When we treat infertility as “her” problem, we not only delay the proper diagnosis but also deepen emotional scars.
Another very common myth is that regardless of how old you are, you can have a child if you are healthy. The majority of couples feel they can afford to have a child later if they are healthy and fit. However, with age, fertility in both men and women decreases. Egg quality and quantity reduce significantly after the age of 35 in women. Sperm motility and DNA integrity in men also decrease with age. So, delaying too long will decrease the chance of conception and make treatment more difficult.
There is also a pretty highly embedded myth that it’s unnatural to receive fertility services, that having a child must occur “naturally,”. Further, that visiting the physician for assistance is tampering with nature. This is a product of cultural indoctrination and ignorance. Contemporary fertility treatment, such as IUI or IVF, is not about substituting nature. It is about enhancing nature when biological or medical obstacles stand in the way. Seeking help is not a sign of desperation; it’s a sign of courage and self-assurance.
Stigma stops couples from seeking help
Stigma is a silent but strong factor that hinders the couple from seeking assistance. Most couples are afraid of being diagnosed as “barren,” “incomplete,” or “less of a man or woman.” Such degrading and archaic terms have a tendency to make couples continue in silence instead of getting early medical advice. This silence can corrode relationships from within. As a result, communication fades, blame creeps in, and emotional distance grows. The real battle is not just medical but social and emotional as well.
For the female, the stigma is harsher in character. A woman’s worth is measured by society in terms of how many children she can bear, as though her existence is defined by how she can conceive. ItFurther, it also keeps them from speaking up or getting help in the initial stages. It is pitiful to see women suffer shame over what is largely outside their own control.
Men, on the other hand, face their own form of stigma, the fear of being judged as “less masculine.” Many men hesitate to undergo a simple semen analysis because of misplaced pride or embarrassment. But avoiding the issue doesn’t solve it; it only prolongs the pain. Understanding that fertility has nothing to do with masculinity is the first step toward breaking this taboo.
The second perilous myth that I usually encounter is that untested cultural customs or home remedies will cure infertility. While some lifestyle changes may enhance fertility, self-medication or heeding only non-scientific counsel could squander valuable time. Infertility problems are multifaceted and can be quite different from individual to individual. Timely medical intervention, with the guidance of an expert, can be the turning point between success and failure.
Knowledge is key to breaking myths
Breaking these myths is done by being awake, empathetic, and brave. The beginning is by normalising the dialogue. The couple may talk about fertility just like any other health condition. Discourse on infertility does not place you at risk; it places you at empowerment. We need to substitute judgment with empathy and silence with kindness as a population.
Something I’ve learned from working at Ova Fertility and Women Care and Good Vibes Within is that when people come to fertility with an open mind and a relationship, it’s less daunting and more optimistic. I always teach them to set their sights beyond the cultural pressure and not on emotional health. Early intervention doesn’t just enhance the medical results but also diminishes emotional anguish.
Infertility isn’t a death sentence
To every couple who might be reading this, I would like to say the following: infertility is not a death sentence; it’s a condition that can be cured. And the earlier you seek help, the better your chances of success. There is no shame in wanting a family, and there is certainly no shame in asking for help to build one.
Infertility is shamed in silence, but silence never cured anyone. When we talk about it freely, we shatter the cycle of misinformation and grief. Remember, fertility is not something to be worn as a badge of honor; it’s part of health, and health is worthy of empathy, not censure.
It’s time to rewrite the tale: seeking help is not a weakness, but a sign of strength. Because healing, physically, emotionally, and as an entirety, is the biggest choice two people can ever make.
Dr. Snehal Kohale is Fertility Specialist and Women’s Health Specialist
& Founder, Ova Fertility and Women Care
